Code of Conduct

Urban Monastics, like the Church community as a whole, is made up of people from all over the world. We live in various places. We have different backgrounds, and every other difference one can imagine. Each of us is a part of Urban Monastics for our own reasons. We share a common desire to be present with God and present with others. We are on our own journeys into an intentional life of prayer, simplicity, work, and hospitality.

Diversity is a strength of the global Church and of our community. We want to ensure everyone can have a good experience. This may require extra consideration, empathy, and attention. To that end, we have a few ground rules to help us embody grace, mercy, and love. This code applies equally to everyone in the community. The code is not an exhaustive list of things you cannot do. Rather, it is a guide to make it easier to enrich all of us, along with the churches and communities in which we participate.

This code of conduct applies to all spaces provided by Urban Monastics. This includes our applications, social media, events, retreats, and more. It extends to any other space in which we interact. In addition, violations of this code in other spaces may affect one’s ability to participate.

Do you believe someone is violating the code of conduct? We ask that you report it by contacting one of the admin community members below.

Be Patient and Gracious.

Together, let us do our best to meet each other with grace. Grace allows for the fullness of our experience. Each of us will have good days and bad days. Each is deserving of grace every day. Grace does not expect perfection, but invites one another to be present as they are. On our journey towards perfection, let us practice patience. Let us be patient with ourselves, and with one another.

Be Welcoming.

We strive to be a welcoming and supportive community for all. We want to be a welcoming place for people of all backgrounds and identities. This includes, but is not limited to, members of: any race, ethnicity, culture, national origin, color, immigration status, social and economic class, educational level, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity and expression, age, size, family status, political belief, religion, religious tradition, and mental and physical ability.

Be Considerate and Respectful.

As in life, we will not agree with each other all the time. These disagreements are not an excuse for poor behavior. We may experience some frustration now and then. Do not allow that frustration to turn into a personal attack. It is a vulnerable process when one is exploring God, ourselves, and our world. A community that makes people feel uncomfortable or threatened makes that more difficult. As a part of this community, you should interact with respect. Respect one another, and our differences. Also extend this respect to those beyond our community.

Be Careful in the Words that you Choose.

We are a community that exists only because of the grace and love of Jesus. We should conduct ourselves with grace and love. Be kind to others. Do not insult or put others down. Harassment and other exclusionary behavior is not acceptable.

This includes, but is not limited to:

  • Violent threats or language directed against another person, or groups of people.
  • Discriminatory jokes and language.
  • Posting sexually explicit or violent material.
  • Posting (or threatening to post) other people’s personally identifying information (“doxing”).
  • Personal insults, especially those using racist, xenophobic, ableist, homophobic or sexist terms.
  • Unwelcome sexual attention.
  • Advocating for, or encouraging, any of the above behavior.
  • Repeated harassment of others.
  • In general, if someone asks you to stop, then stop.

In Disagreement, Try to Understand Why.

Disagreements, both social and theological, happen all the time. Urban Monastics is no exception. It is important that we meet disagreements and differing views with grace. Remember that we are different. The diversity in the global Church is a strength. It has always been a diverse community of people. Different people have different valid perspectives on issues. Being unable to understand why someone holds a viewpoint doesn’t mean that they’re wrong. Disagreements often end without unified thought. Don’t forget that it is human to err and that blaming each other doesn’t get us anywhere. Instead, focus on helping to resolve issues and learning from mistakes.

Arguing in Bad Faith is Disrespectful.

We should expect one another to have conversations in good faith. We should expect that we are being honest and fair with one another. When someone argues in bad faith, they are being disrespectful. There are two parts to a bad faith argument. First, they argue a position that is factually disproven. Second, they know that they are being dishonest, or unfair with their position. This behavior is in violation of our code of conduct.

Sexual Contact is Off Limits.

In Urban Monastic spaces, we each choose to abstain from sexual contact. It is off limits to help us foster spaces of presence with God and others. Our abstinence includes both our words and deeds. Within our spaces, everyone will abstain; single and partnered. We meet in spaces that are both physical and virtual. In physical spaces, we abstain from the time we arrive until we leave. This includes overnight. By participating, you agree to abstain from sexual contact in our spaces.

Failure to abstain will result in exclusion from our physical spaces. Those who violate this rule may also be banned from virtual spaces. Anyone who assaults or harasses may be reported to law enforcement.

Urban Monastics is a Community to Participate in. It is not an Audience to Broadcast to.

If you are intending to join solely to access the community as an audience, this is not the place for you. We value meaningful participation more than promotion. You are allowed to promote something you’re passionate about. However, it should not be the first thing you do. It should not be the majority of your participation. Please share in the appropriate places. If you are unsure, just ask. Avoid sharing the same content in multiple places. Generally speaking, the more you participate and engage, the more you will get out of this community.

Have a Question or Need to Report a Violation?

Please contact one, or more, of the following Urban Monastics admin community members:

Paul Prins
Jordan Prins
Sheila Whittenberg